


As he stands under the bar lights

by cravethefall



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-06-21
Updated: 2014-10-16
Packaged: 2018-02-05 14:36:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 6,856
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1822012
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cravethefall/pseuds/cravethefall
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Marco moves from his hometown to the snowy University of Alaska, where he has to start over as a first year student in a place he doesn't know.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Meeting new people

That night was meant to be perfect. It was meant for new opportunities, second chances, a new aim at finding true love. Yes, that sounded a bit dreamy, but he couldn't stop himself from keeping his head in the clouds. He had always been a dreamy kid, and he thought this was his chance to shine. 

The wooden bar seats weren't the most appealing he had ever seen, but they had a nice, familiar atmosphere to them. The smell of alcoholic beverages he didn't even recognize filled the cramped air, and the constant thrumming beat of the band that played at the stage hit Marco's head like a hammer. But he didn't care - couldn't care - this was his opportunity at starting a new life. He downed another sip of vodka, causing him to spin a bit on his barstool. 

"Wow, wow. Hey, be careful." Startled, he turned to find two intense emerald green eyes piercing him. Despite his seemingly rude words, his smile was kind. 

"Sorry, too much alcohol..." Marco managed to say, turning his stool toward the short stranger. Or maybe it was just that he himself was too tall. 

The guy smiled at Marco, offering a hand to him. As Marco was sitting down, and the guy was small, they were at eye level. 

"Do you want to dance?" Really, he loved dancing. And even though he didn't quite know this guy and that this was his first night out of his hometown and into this new world called the University of Alaska, he gladly complied. He couldn't spend much time sitting down, after all, as he was a really nervous kid, and the striking-eyed guy looked like a good person. So, Marco followed him through the mass of people moshing and lost himself into the music. 

BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM 

"So, what's your name?"

BOOM BOOM BOOM 

"I'm Marco! And you?" 

BOOM BOOM 

"I'm Eren!" 

BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM 

They tried to make conversation above the loud music, but decided to give up after realizing it was pointless. Marco was having fun, the most since he had left home that morning, goodbye-ing his beloved parents, who had smiled at him reassuringly, always having faith in him. He felt hopeful at the memory. He was going to do his best here at the uni, and meet lots of new people. He had already met Eren, for starters. He grinned to himself while watching the other boy dance. His moves were clumsy but still fluid, and he danced like he didn't notice the rest of the pub around him. 

Finally, the two decided to get a break and go get some drinks. While Eren tried to catch the barman's attention, Marco sat down at the barstool he had begun his night sitting on. He felt tired, but kind of a happy tired. 

Feeling movement just beside his left elbow, he turned to the side, thinking Eren had finally fetched their drinks. But, surprisingly, he found himself staring at two dark amber eyes, and a strikingly good-looking face. Sure he was noticing Marco's staring, he tried to make conversation with the guy. 

"Hey." Marco tried to look friendly, but he was sure his expression was near starstruck. The guy, looking nervous to being approached like that, scratched the back of what now Marco could appreciate was an undercut. 

"Hello." The new stranger replied. He looked like he wasn't used to be spoken to this directly, or... maybe he just wasn't into guys? 'Oh my God', Marco thought to himself, 'I am making him uncomfortable by hitting on him, maybe he's straight, Oh, God'. Marco didn't know what to say then, but was startled when the stranger's expression turned into rage. 

"JAEGER!" He exclaimed, looking just above Marco's shoulder. Eren had finally returned with their drinks. "What are you doing here? I told you not to come, ever! Over all right now, when I'm on a precarious situation!" Eren smirked at the stranger, mocking him. Then, he handed Marco his drink. At this gesture, the blond stranger looked astonished. 

"Jean, if you wanted to find a good catch like I have," Eren said, patting Marco's shoulder in a protective way, "you should have come with me. You know how everyone loves me." Marco couldn't understand what was going on between them, but he could feel Eren's anger below his grin. Jean got up in an instant. 

"Listen up, you tiny little imp. You can't treat people like trophies, okay? You already have enough with the silent girl and your blond fanboy following you around all the time." Jean grabbed Eren by the collar of his shirt, lifting him so they were at eye level. 

Eren looked ready to spit onto Jean's face. "Mikasa and Armin are my friends..." he said, but he looked like he had realized how wrong he had been. 

"I don't care." Jean let go of him. Eren looked embarrassed, so after apologizing to Marco, he left the pub, not forgetting to punch Jean on the shoulder. After almost reaching to strangle the short guy, Jean turned towards Marco. 

"If that asshole bothers you again, be sure to call me." He slipped a piece of paper onto Marco's pocket, blushing furiously. Then, he ran for the exit, shouting a quick "it was nice meeting you bye!" and leaving. 

What a weird guy, Marco thought to himself, smiling down at the piece of paper he felt inside his pocket. 

He liked him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is the first chapter from one of my first tries at fanfiction, please feel free to comment!! thanks so much for reading, and have a nice day!!!  
> you can follow me on tumblr, i'm cravethefall


	2. First day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Marco's first day at university has arrived. There he will meet new friends, a crazy roommate, a weird teacher and someone he was hoping to see again.

September, when you thought about it, didn't sound any colder than every other month. But here, in the University of Alaska, it was even worse than Marco could've imagined. In fact, he loved cold weather, when the streets felt damp and windows filled with frost. So, even thought it wasn't that cold yet, the first thing Marco did when he woke up the next morning was search for a scarf, looking throught his still-packed bags. Last night's experience in the bar had ended up late, sure, but Marco had always been much of a morning person. Throwing on some pair of jeans and a grey sweater, he headed towards the door. Just then, he noticed his roommate, Connie, was still asleep. He wasn't used to sharing his room, so he had totally forgotten about him. 

When Marco arrived yesterday, before going to the pub, he had met Connie. Despite his short stature and small complexion, he seemed to fill the entire room with his presence. He had greeted Marco like they were long-lost friends, and he took an instant like to him. Connie had proven to be a really excited person, and was always on a good mood, which pleased Marco, being the happy person that he was. But asleep, Connie looked peaceful, clinging on to the matress like his life depended on sleeping. He was drooling all over his pillow, sprawled on a risky position. 

BEEP BEEP 

The cheerful beeping startled Marco back into reality. Seeing Connie didn't do as much as change into another uncomfortable-looking position, he carefully approached the sleeping boy, and tapped his bare shoulder. That finally woke Connie, who suddenly got up from the bed with a start. 

"What?" He didn't sound rude so much as startled. "Mom, I've told you I don't like- wait, you're not Mom..." Connie rubbed his eyes with the back of his right hand, and looked up to Marco's taller figure. 

"Sorry for that, it's just that you weren't waking up even when the alam went off." Marco apologized, but still laughing internally at Connie calling him 'Mom'. 

"Oh, crap, thanks for that, dude. It's usually my mother who shakes me until I wake up..." his expression turned sad, "and I'm used to her doing that. Oh, God, this is my first day out of my Mom's home and here at University, and I already feel homesick." Marco patted Connie's head simpathetically, as his shoulder was way too low to reach. He could relate to that, too. 

"Don't worry, just promise me you'll get ready early enough to arrive at your first class on time." Marco smiled fondly at Connie, watching him nod. 

"Of course, man. See ya later!" 

* * * * * 

Marco arrived five minutes early to his first class. He had philosophy first thing in the morning. And, although he much preferred biology, or physics, he tried to stay positive at the beginning of the class. When he reached the door, he sighed silently to himself, as another blond guy was already there. At least he wouldn't spend his first minutes alone. He approached one of the front seats as he was accostumed to sit on the front row in high school, preferably the middle. Leaving his book and pens on his desk, he moved onto getting to know the other student there. 

"Hello." A soft but low voice whispered behind Marco's back. Surprised, he turned around expecting to see a normal-sized human, but encountering a dark, small man instead. He was almost as short as Connie, if not shorter, and had a cat-like feel to him. 

"Hi, I'm Marco!" Smiling broadly, he presented himself to the little man, extending his hand to him. He looked at it in disgust, and seemed to want to shove it away, so Marco hid it behind his back. 

"You can't touch me. When was even the last time you washed it anyway?" Marco was surprised, and he wondered whether if he was going to be his teacher and if he could change class or something, out of embarrassment. "I am professor Levi, and, yes, you'll have to suffer me all the year, or more likely, I'll be the one who'll have to suffer you all fucking annoying shits." Then he turned around and left, surely to prepare the class. 'Wow,' Marco thought to himself. 

By the time he recovered from the conversation with professor Levi, the blond guy had noticed him there. He was kind of a silent person, but he went to Marco and presented himself as Braun, Reiner Braun. Then, he sympathetically placed a hand on Marco's shoulder and left to his seat, as other students started to rush into the class before it started. Professor Levi got up from his seat and pressed his palms on the desk. 

"Today, fuckwards, we're learning philosophy." 

* * * * * 

The class seemed to go on for hours, but it finally came to a close. It looked like most students feared Prof Levi, even the ones who seemed tough weren't unfazed by him. So, when the class ended, everyone hurried across the room and left. Marco picked up his stuff with the rest of the class, and smiled when Reiner silently waved at him while he left. While passing throught the desks, he noticed a familiar face snoring on the back rows. It was Jean. Jean, with his handsome face and golden hair and lean complexion. He was almost falling back in his chair, and a few seconds before he hit the floow, he woke with a start and righted himself up. 

"Wow, that was close!" He muttered to himself, scratching his undercut sleepily. Just then, he looked up and his gaze met Marco's for a second. Then , he skimmed through his notes, covering his face, but Marco noticed that, in fact, he was blushing. Wow, did he look cute then. Jean seemed to order his thoughts back into place and smiled smugly at Marco, trying to hide his flustering. 

"Hey, it's you! I didn't quite catch your name last night, did I?" He got up and extended his right hand to him, then, all signs of his embarrasment clear from his face. 

This was always the hard part. Everyone always made the joke, and Jean right now looked exactly like the type of guy who would make it. "I'm Marco, not Polo, but Bodt." Jean seemed amused by the comment. 

"Noted, Marco-not-Polo-but-Bodt, can I shorten it to 'Polo-Butt'?" Marco nearly smacked him in the shoulder. Refusing then to take Jean's hand, which still hung between them, Marco left for the door, getting out of the class. The cold wind brushed gently against his face, like in a welcoming manner, and Marco put his scarf on again around his neck. He felt Jean running just behind him. He was able to reach him, but not without almost spreading all his notes on the floor. Jean looked sheepish. 

Changing his mind about Jean, Marco decided should at leat thank him for yesterday's encounter, for defending his integrity. "Jean... Um, what's your surname again?" 

"Kirschtein." 

"Jean Kirschtein, I think I owe you a thank-you." He said, looking sideways at him while they wandered through the halls. 

Jean adopted that smug expression again. "Well, it wasn't much of a sacrifice anyway, that shitbag Jaeger deserved it." 

"But it was, to me, so thank you again." Marco then remembered something. He had written down his own phone number on a white card that morning, to carry it always with him in case he returned to the bar or somehow encountered Jean again. He knew the chances were slim, but he had held onto the hope of seeing him again. Marco got the piece of paper from between his own notes and handed it to him. Jean stared at it shortly, then, realizing what it was, put it safely on his back pocket, afraid the wind would blow it. 

"Thanks, I'll be sure to call you." Just then, the alarm rang, announcing the start of the next class. Jean swore loudly. He ran past across the hall, apologizing above his shoulder. 

"See you later!" It was last night all over again, with Jean rushing from his side. History repeated itself. 

Marco sighed happily, but then realized he needed to be in a class too, so he rushed to it in a blessed haze.


	3. Roommates and their friends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jean and Marco deal with their own roommates and the friends of these.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm introducing here jean's pov because i feel he has a lot to tell too, and also so we have an insight to the two's way of thinking and what they think of each other

That night, Jean arrived to his old room after having spent the whole day from one class to another, and then on the dorm trying to arrange all of his classes and what homework he would be doing the rest of the year. He had always hated the mess of the first day when classes started, and liked to keep everything organized and his notes classified by subject, and he wasn't going to give up that practice now, when he needed to do his best at university. He didn't bother knocking the door, as he knew his new roommate wouldn't be doing anything inappropriate -say, like his old roommate, that Jaeger piece of shit, who was  
always up to something- so he opened the door and came in. Armin was sitting on the carpet, resting his face on his bed, all his mop of blond hair almost hiding his blue eyes. Just in front of him gorgeous Mikasa was staring at the floor, all dressed in black except for that red scarf, a gift from Jaeger, he had heard it was. Such a pity she had fallen for the boy. He was such an annoying fuck. He willed his thoughts to turn to Armin, who looked sick.

"What happened, Armin?" Jean said, approaching the boy cautiously. Mikasa's eyes were empty as well.

"It's Eren, he-"

"WHAT HAS THAT SHITBAG DONE TO YOU, HUH? I swear I'll fucking kill him if-" Armin didn't let Jean finish, grabbing his arm with a grim expression.

“I think you already know what this is about.” _Oh. Yes._ Jean knew they were both head over heels about Eren, and was guessing he had told them about last night’s encounter with Marco. It amused Jean that they would think Marco liked that shitbag Jaeger. The thought repelled him, but he didn’t know why. He couldn’t see himself with Marco because, well, he had maybe had some doubts about his sexuality, but he had always quickly shoved them away, mostly because his grandmother would kill him. Yes, they were poor, yes, they almost couldn’t afford Jean being at the University of Alaska, but damn it if his grandma wouldn’t kick him out of her home if she found out he wasn’t straight. Even if Jean was her only source of income. He had already commented it to Eren last night, in the bar! Jaeger knew Jean would be there, at the pub, because he knew they were hiring, and he needed to find a job as soon as he could. But that stupid fuck Jaeger had gone there, anyway, and met Marco… which led to the conclusion that Jean was Armin and Mikasa’s reason to be sad, because if he hadn’t told Eren, he wouldn’t have met Marco, and…

“JEAN! I know that face you’re pulling. I know you think it’s your fault and you’re drowning inside your own thoughts. Please don’t do that. I hate it when you blame everything on yourself!” Armin got up from his place on the carpet, grabbing Jean’s arm.

“I am so sorry, but really, you both” he glanced at Mikasa, who was just silently staring at the floor, as passive as always, “have nothing to worry about. Marco is a really good person, and Jaeger has zero possibilities with him.” Blushing preceded Jean’s words. He couldn’t see Mikasa’s hidden beautiful face, but Armin wore a furious redness all along his cheeks and neck, which made his blue eyes stand up in comparison. 

“I don’t… he’s only my…” Armin tried to express himself without choking from embarrassment.

Jean held a hand to the air. “Don’t even try.” He patted his back trouser’s pocket, remembering something. “Look, I’m going to grab something cheap to eat and have dinner, if any of you want anything, tell me.” Mikasa looked up, the first time since he had arrived. 

“Can you buy me some donuts? They’re for a friend.” Jean looked disoriented for a bit, but then nodded. Mikasa threw some money in his direction and then turned to leave. Armin waved Jean goodbye, and he left, too. 

He had wanted to talk to Marco and get to know him better since he himself had handed him his phone number. But he had been busy all day, so now that he had some spare time, he decided trying to text him and maybe, if he was lucky and Marco actually wanted to be his friend, invite him to join Jean to have dinner, though he would have to pay his own food, because Jean wasn’t sure if they were going to hire him at the bar yet. They said they would ‘give him a call’, but hadn’t heard anything yet.

Well, back to his own reality, he took out his phone and started typing.

* * * * *

“So… he likes you, right?” Connie seemed _so_ sure of it, but Marco didn’t think so. 

“No, he just… gave me his number, and then I gave him mine and all, but we haven’t spoken yet on the phone or anything.” Grabbing Marco’s phone, Connie looked for Jean’s number to check if he was online. He hadn’t been since that morning. Then, he showed Sasha Jean’s profile picture. She shook her head. 

“I don’t know him, but he looks familiar. I think he and Eren were roommates or something like that, but had to be separated because they would never stop fighting each other.” Sasha touched her chocolate bangs and shoved them out of her face. The motion caused her ponytail to hit Connie’s face, and so he pulled her hair and pushed her to the floor. Only her feet remained now on the bed, and she tried to kick Connie on the chin, but failed. Marco couldn’t help but snort at the two; they were only little kids playing university students. 

“Connie, I swear, you’ll have to buy me cinnamon rolls for what you just did.” Marco had learned Sasha was some kind of a food enthusiast and she never doubted in shoving whatever was at hand at her mouth. For instance, when Connie had introduced them, Sasha had almost smelled Marco’s chips through the door. But she was nice and positive, much like Connie, and that was a quality Marco appreciated.

“I’ll buy you donuts-“ Sasha lit up at the mention of what Marco assumed was her favourite food, “-if you tell Professor Levi he’s ‘a charming individual’ or something like that.” Sasha froze in horror at Connie’s words.

“He’ll RIP MY THROAT OUT.” She grabbed a pillow and threw it at Connie.

“I met him this morning and… well; he seemed a bit… peculiar. Does he hate people, or just me and the class?” Marco wondered aloud.

“No, I think he hates teenagers in general. The only person I have seen him not swear at is director Erwin, but maybe it’s only because he’s his boss.” Connie said, and Sasha agreed, nodding her head repeatedly.

BING BING

Marco’s phone chirped. Maybe it was Mom, who had promised to text him later to see how he was doing? He read the text eagerly.

> From: Jean Kirschtein :)
> 
> hey marco!! u wanna go grab something 4 dinner?

Marco screamed internally. What? Jean wanted to have dinner with him? He felt so happy he wanted to jump up and down on his bed. Sasha and Connie noticed his agitation and quickly sat beside Marco on his bed, trying to take his phone from him. They fought for it, but Marco, being taller than the two, held his phone out of reach.

“Let me at least reply, and then I’ll show you both the conversation!” He pleaded. The two instantly grinned with satisfaction. What a pair of kids.

> From: Marco Bodt
> 
> Sure. Meet you at the uni reception?

He nervously fidgeted on the bed, looking around the room trying to remember where he had left his money last night. He looked for it while waiting for a reply. He had just retrieved it from his nightstand when he heard the beeping sound again. 

> From: Jean Kirschtein :)
> 
> ok be there in five

While he prepared himself for dinner, Sasha and Connie read over their texts. He finally left them, nervous as ever, but not before they had spoken to him some encouraging words on how life’s short and he should take some risks. He left the room filled with joy at this new shot at getting to know Jean, but still edgy. ‘Please let this end well’ he kind of prayed, while he contemplated Jean’s lean silhouette, darkened against the nightfall sky. 


	4. A boy's day out... kind of

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Marco and Jean are hanging out tonight...

Marco looked so cute Jean couldn't help but stare. Winter hadn't quite arrived yet, but it was cold as fuck already, and even though that had bothered Jean for a while, now, watching Marco approach him, he didn't mind. At all. His blue sweater stood up in comparison with his dark skin, and his freckles were as visible as ever, with Marco's white scarf around them. Jean felt himself warm instantly, a shy smile escaping his stiff lips.

"Hey, Marco." His smile matched his instantly, tension leaving his body. Jean noticed Marco was as nervous as him.

"Hi," Marco replied, a bit shy at first, but easing up at Jean's expression. "So, where did you want to have dinner?" He said, starting to walk out of the campus, the trees towering above him casting shadows all over his tall figure. Even though it was almost dinnertime, the moon seemed reluctant to light up the sky yet.

“Oh, I was thinking something nice and quick, like a burger at McDonald’s maybe?” Usually, Jean would have imposed his wants without hesitation, but with Marco, he wanted to make sure he enjoyed himself too, even in matters as stupid as what to grab for dinner. Marco nodded in agreement, and they began to walk the path from the campus to the restaurant area. Even though a school night, the little square seemed packed with adolescents escaping routine and homework. Jean marched nervously beside Marco as they approached the nearest Mickey D. He watched him closely, trying to read his expression. Would he be embarrassed of being seen with him? Would he get nervous because of all of the people inside? As hard as Jean tried to hide it, large amounts of people made him edgy.

“Quit staring, it’s making me nervous.” Marco shifted a bit in his sweater. Embarrassed, Jean looked away and to the glowing light of the McDonald’s.

“Um, Jean?” The boy suddenly started. Jean eyed him curiously.

“Yeah?”

“What do you say if we… um… eh…” Marco blushed at his own shortage of words.

“… Go make some dinner ourselves in our dorm rooms?” Marco’s face lit up. Jean knew what he was thinking about without even asking him. Mostly because he was thinking the same thing.  Jean thought maybe Marco got a bit overwhelmed by being surrounded by too much people, and the MacDonalds looked ready to burst.

“Yeah! That’s what I was going to say!” Afraid Marco would change his mind about their plans again, Jean rushed on to the supermarket.

“We need to buy some things first though, as I have nothing edible in my room.” Marco pointed out, explaining his roommate’s friend, Sasha, ate everything she found around their room.

“Oh, I know that one… she’s friends with Mikasa… which reminds me, she asked me to bring her some donuts, claiming they were for a friend… wonder if it’s her?” Jean thought out loud. He was used to voicing his every single thought aloud, but Marco didn’t seem to mind. In fact, he pressed on.

“And you know Connie? My roommate? He’s such a bright person, a bit crazy in the good way, but he always looks happy!” Jean swore to himself. He almost never looked happy, and Marco seemed to be quite fond of people who were... He’d have to start changing that.

“Yeah, he sounds familiar… a short guy? With manic eyes?” Marco laughed out loud, and Jean followed suit.

“Yes, exactly that one!” the conversation went on and on, they both talking about the teachers they had in common, and the friends of friends they knew. It was comfortable for Jean to talk to Marco, because he never cared if he swore too much or if he had an opinion about everything or if he was too outspoken, it was easy to just talk with him about anything. Finally, they arrived the supermarket, both too absorbed by themselves to notice until they felt the hot air conditioner inside the store. Marco suggested they could have some already made pasta, the one you only had to microwave and carried it own sauce and all. Jean, not being very fond of that kind of canned food, suggested something else.

“You know, not to brag or anything, but I’m actually a really good cook. I can cook almost anything. Except fish. But maybe that’s just because I hate fish. Not that I hate the animal, but like-“ The amused look on Marco’s eyes made him shut up.

* * *

_**Such** a dork _ was the only thing Marco thought of while Jean explained all of his specialties and how tasty his quesadillas were. That, and ‘I am going to his room or he’s going to mine! Tonight! And he’s going to make me dinner!’ He tried to hide his feelings though, appearing as what he hoped looked not nervous at all and at ease. He stirred away from his own thoughts and focused on what Jean was saying.

“… So then I could make some Thai noodles? They’re one of my specialties, and I would like you to taste them… The only who has ever tried them besides me is my grandma, but she always says everything I cook is ‘marvelous’, so she doesn’t count.” Jean talked a lot, and Marco was a good listener, so they were even. Though Marco was much of a talker too, so they could carry almost any conversation out.

“Of course, whatever you’d like. You’re the one cooking, after all.” Grinning at Jean, he watched him already get started out, reaching over the shelves to grab soy sauce and searching for onions and whatever more he needed. Marco saw him struggle with a particularly high shelf while he tried to reach some salt. Instantly, the taller boy took it from its place above Jean’s golden hair, touching his hand for a moment without meaning to. Jean’s face had a reddish glow.

“Thanks for that.” He grunted, looking at the ground, embarrassed, and then quickly moving on to grab something else with his back to him. _Such_  a dork. After a few other minutes, Jean had everything he needed. Marco wanted to pay for the necessary ingredients as Jean was going to be the one cooking, but he wouldn’t let him, until he finally agreed to pay half and half. All the way back to the uni, Jean insisted on carrying all the bags by himself. He was lifting them up on his arms, almost covering his chest and face so that his incredibly high haircut was the only visible thing about him. Marco made fun of him for it a few times, every time he thought Jean wanted to drive the conversation far from his hair, he teased him for again for a bit. 

At last, he told him, “We’ll, it suits you just fine, so even though I make fun of it, leave it that way. It looks perfect.” He felt Jean’s heated blush rather than see it in the lazy moonlight, and he laughed silently, hoping Jean wouldn’t hear him as so not to hurt his pride. When they reached the university, Marco made himself ask, 

“So… my dorm or yours?” He knew every dorm had its own kitchen, so they could go to whichever they wanted to. Jean peered at him over the bags he was carrying. 

“Mine.” Marco blushed at his determination, and because of other thoughts that had clouded his mind at the thought of it. Jean, sensing Marco’s discomfort, explained himself. “I’m used to cooking there, besides, I know my dorm is full of lazy asses who spend every week night eating out because they don’t want to ‘waste’ their time cooking.” Marco blushed harder. The two were going to be alone… They headed for Jean’s dorm, and when they got there, he instantly paused like he had been kicked in the gut. 

“What is it?” Marco inquired, looking around for whatever troubled Jean. 

“The keys… they’re on my back pocket.” Jean lifted his left bum, to make it clearer. “Oh… Oh. Want me to take the bags for you?” That would the least embarrassing situation he could imagine.

“Nah, that would be too messy. Would you please just-“ He lifted his shoulder like in a shrug. This is going to be so very awkward. He tried to calm himself but couldn’t. Nervously fumbling around Jean’s back rear, he tried not to think too hard about his tiny little cute butt. The pocket seemed to be enormous, at least for a back pocket, and Marco didn’t seem able to find the keys inside it. He could feel Jean’s nervousness as he fidgeted around, looking for the damned thing. They were both blushing furiously when Sasha appeared into the picture. She instantly squealed at Marco, winking at him. 

“You guys should get a room!” She almost yelled, her lovely bangs moving around as she jumped up and down. 

“He’s just… We’re not…” Jean looked like he wanted to punch something and hide under a rock at the same time. 

“I’m just fetching-“ Oops, not the right choice of words, “his keys from his pocket, we’re trying to get inside to…” 

“Oh! So you _are_ getting a room! Great!” She leapt once more, this time toward the door, and opened it with her own key. Marco was able to hold it open just before her ponytail disappeared inside. 

“After you.” He told Jean, and they both headed inside, ignoring the awkward moment that had just passed between them.

* * *           

Jean felt flattered with Marco’s appraisal of his food. It seemed sincere, he could tell he wasn’t lying or exaggerating, he was telling him just what he thought about his noodles.

“They’re great, really! _More_ than great!” Marco was cheerfully shifting on the love seat while Jean finished serving himself a handful of the Thai noodles and sat down on the dorm’s sofa at Marco’s right side. The low lights were making Jean uncomfortable, because of the thoughts they brought to his mind. He had never been too skilled at drawing, but he was beginning to feel inspired to make a sketch of Marco’s glowing eyes in the dimly lit room, or the perky curve of his nose and _all those freckles._ But he reminded himself, he could not think that, not about a friend, because he was never good at hiding his feelings. Trying to get his mind off those damning thoughts, he changed subject.

“You ever heard of Fall Out Boy?” He asked Marco, wishing he liked them too. He always obsessed over one band or another, mostly for long periods of time, and that was the only music he was listening to at the moment.

Marco’s eyes instantly lit up. “Yes! I love them! Their last album? Save Rock and Roll? I can’t stop listening to it.” They both commented on their love for it, Jean being fonder of their first albums, more punk, and Marco of their latest.

“I _really_ need to show you their first albums, you’d love them.” He told Marco suddenly, remembering he had the first two just upstairs, beside his stereo. He could bring Marco to his room…They were both finished with their food, so Jean thought, _why not?_ The answer came in his grandma’s voice. _Those abominations,_ he remembered her say, _they come here, to church, God’s home, staining the sanctity of marriage. I will not allow any homosexuals, not in my home, not in my country._

But they were friends, right? It wasn’t anything wrong… unless the person he was bringing to his room made him blush and laugh and want to protect him at all costs. His gaze passed over Marco’s features. His eyes were so innocent, yet they shone like glow stones. He couldn’t resist the temptation. _I don’t care whether it’s right or wrong, I just can’t help myself._ Also, he didn’t even know if Marco _liked_ him in that way. Today he was just a mess… maybe it was Marco’s effect on his thoughts, but he surrendered.

“Would you want to come upstairs? I’ll show you my room.” Trying not to blush, he didn’t wait to hear Marco’s answer, he simply grabbed his hand and headed toward his room.

Jean didn’t hesitate at the door of his room, for he knew he would chicken out. Turning the doorknob over, he ushered Marco inside.

“Um… Jean? Who is this?” Jean’s eyes popped open from where he stood, closing the door, his back to the rest of the room. That was Armin’s voice. He nearly smacked himself on his ample forehead. He had a roommate! How could have he forgotten about that! He turned around to find Armin’s watery blue eyes, Marco’s candid one’s and Mikasa’s freezing stare, all directed at him. He uncomfortably coughed twice.


	5. A boy's day out... kind of part 2

* * *

Marco couldn’t stand like a piece of furniture all day. He introduced himself to the friendly blond first, then to the mysterious girl. He instantly took a like to her. He’d like to get to know her more.

“Hi, I’m Marco! I’m in Jean’s philosophy class, the one with Prof Levi.” Armin’s and Mikasa’s faces lit up in recognition. Mikasa was the one to talk first.

“You know Eren.” The name sounded familiar. He looked over at Jean, who was nervously chewing his own lip, his face unreadable. Armin got up from the bed he was sitting on and offered Marco a seat at the desk’s only chair, dangerously close to Mikasa’s lean figure. Jean was still standing looking at nothing, lost in thought. 

“Thank you.” Marco paused. It seemed like both of the new met strangers were waiting to hear on Marco’ say about that guy Eren. The thing was, he couldn’t even place where he had heard the name in the first place.   
“Eren… Eren… I think I have heard his name before, I just don’t quite recall… Oh. Oh. I know Eren. He was the guy at the bar, right?” He couldn’t tell Mikasa’s expressionless face, but Armin looked grim. He sensed something was off with the two and the Eren person, so he just admitted, “I haven’t seen him nor heard of him ever since that night. Are you two looking for him or something?” Armin exhaled so loudly the whole room seemed to fill up with relief. He started smiling, an easy smile that made Marco more comfortable, and even Mikasa seemed to relax a bit. She suddenly jerked up from her spot lying against the wall. 

“Jean? You brought what I told you to? Her room is just below us, and I’ve been waiting for you to arrive so I could give them to her.”

Jean shook out of his trance-like state. Passing his fingers through his hair and shagging it up a little, he said, “Marco.”

Marco stared at his lap. Oh yes! He remembered the two had bought some donuts for Mikasa as she had commanded to Jean. He handed them over. “Here you are. You say they are for Sasha? She’s my roommate’s best friend, maybe you know him?” 

They talked about their acquaintances, Marco and her, both absorbed by their conversation, while Jean led Armin to the far side of the room.

* * * 

“Armin?” Jean felt his erratic breath getting a bit out of control. He looked up at him through his golden mop of hair. It seemed to reflect the light in the room. The inquiry in his eyes made him realize Armin had noticed his nervous breakdown. Armin nodded thoughtfully. 

“Look, you know I don’t like talking about those things… you know, about ‘love’ and that kind of stuff, mostly-“ he didn’t like admitting this to anyone, but if there was someone with whom he could talk to, that was Armin, they had been friends since what seemed like forever. Those thoughts in mind, he opened up his heart. “-mostly because they frighten me. I’m afraid of love and of my wavering sexuality and of what I will do if grandma finds out.” 

Armin took both of his shoulders in his tiny hands. “Relax, Jean. Breathe. Again. Not so fast! Slowly. Okay, look. I know your gramma, and I know she loves you, but I also know about her views about sexuality-“

“Homophobic.” Jean intervened.

“Well, that’s maybe what she is. But the thing is, she doesn’t have to know. And even before that, you can have friends. New friends, friends you haven’t met at your old school or friends your grandma doesn’t know about. You definitely can befriend Marco, and if things, well, if you feel that way toward him, then all the better. It doesn’t have to be complicated, and your grandma can not know about it. Just relax.” Armin hugged him for a bit. Jean felt better now. 

“You’re right. I don’t even know if that’s what I’m feeling toward him, or if he even likes me. Look at him chatting with Mikasa! I haven’t seen her talking to anyone that long besides Jaeger or Sasha… or, of course, you. Look at what a good kid he is… Hey! What if he isn’t, you know, into guys either?” Jean was ranting again, he could feel it. Armin shot him a reassuring smile. 

“Then you’ll have to find out. Come on, let’s see what these two are chatting about.” 

* * *

“And Mikasa likes Lord of the Rings too!” Marco exclaimed happily as he descended the stairs with Jean. Marco didn’t know it, but Mikasa wouldn’t admit to that anytime soon. She was ‘above all that nerdy stuff’, like she had once told Jean, with her leather-strapped boots and dark outfit. Who would’ve guessed it would be Marco to unveil all of her secrets? 

“She loves Gimly for what she told me, ‘his independence of mind and willingness to defend the honor of his own people’, she seems so smart!”

“You should see her grades…” Jean murmured, just as they arrived at the dorm’s doors. “Do you want me to accompany you to your dorm?” He asked Marco, suddenly nervous. What if he thought he was weird and never wanted to see him again? 

Marco refused his offer. “No, no, don’t worry about that. It’s just around the corner…” Jean sighed. So, he didn’t even want him close to him for two minutes more. 

Marco shifted his weight from one foot to another, and got close to Jean, and closer, and so Jean closed his eyes, waiting for the inevitable… until Marco gave Jean a quick kiss on the cheek. Only then did Jean reopen his eyes, only to see he was gone. Maybe it had all been his imagination?

He saw a shadow running toward the closest dorm. Maybe not, he thought, a grin on his face.


End file.
